Today I met with a counselor at the fertility clinic. As much as I was looking forward a chance to cry in a safe place, it turned out to just be an informational Q&A session. That is good too, but where I am going to get my cry on tonight? Certainly not answering my American tax accountants questions about the location of my W-2!
Perhaps this means its time to go back to the old-school techniques of angst channeling- old school as in, what would I do when I was in high school... you know as in 'back before I got separated from my ovaries," back when I had the coping skills of a possum - it is time to make a mix tape.
My current project is to come up with a list of songs that flow one into another that mix joy and heartache in a soothing cocktail of angst fueling waterfalls tears that crash down on your arms that hug your soul rocking back and forth.
Here is the start of my list:
Crane's wife -3 - Decemberists
Rent theme song
Mother and Children Reunion - Paul Simon
The Promise - Tracy Chapman
In these shoes
Any other suggestions?
About me
- Smiling
- As a teenager, I lost most of my ovaries during the surgical removal of bilateral dermoid cysts. I was left with a smiling scar just like my mother's Cesarean one. No one hinted that only ten years later I would be racing my mother through menopause! Well, technically its premature ovarian failure, but the hot flashes sure are the same! But while she gets to gracefully age, I have to figure out how to fit my twenty-something dreams into my new reality. This is blog is my space to less than gracefully start that journey. UPDATE: I post now over at circlesbecomeme.wordpress.com Email: Smiling.scar at gmail
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